Work, Abundance, and Blessings

'O, My Gosh! It needs to be fed AGAIN!' was a phrase heard frequently last night as Kennedy multi-tasked taking care of Fiameta and trying to do homework. Fiameta 'came alive' at exactly 4:00 PM as predicted! You could here her coo, CRY, breathing, and eating. Feeding of course was followed up by burping and diaper changing. Madison even came to the rescue a few times to coddle and sooth. Kennedy was fortunate that Fiameta decided to sleep from 10:00 PM until 5:00 AM this morning. Fiameta then promptly, as promised 'shut off' at 7:00 AM this morning. Really? If babies were really that easy!

My simple statement before heading to bed last night checking in on Kennedy feeding the baby while trying to do her homework was, 'What have you learned from this experience?'

Kennedy, 'That this is A LOT of work!'

In route to home last night following a marketing gig I did to promote Reveal, I received a VERY happy phone call, from a VERY happy husband. Thinking he had sold some financial products at his 4:30 appointment, I quickly returned his phone call to celebrate with him. Instead Madison picked up and after giving me the low down on Fiameta she also added, 'Dad has some really exciting news!' That made me, extra curious!

He proceeded to share that our accountant had called to let us know our taxes were complete. The amount we were getting back was close to 5Xs more than any other year! In fact, it was only $600 short of being the EXACT amount we need to complete our short term savings goal set at the beginning of 2009. A goal we were hoping to hit by July, in order to provide a buffer as we transition to a 100% commission family! He then followed up the good news with 'God IS Good!' In 2008 we gave our final contribution to our churches' debt reduction campaign. This accompanied by all of the other donations given last year nearly matched the amount that we were getting back.

In believe that our willingness to give abundantly in 2008 coupled with our discipline in 2009 to be better stewards of our resources, while still maintaining our giving, resulted in God's provision for us and a BLESSING indeed!

When YOU abundantly GIVE, you will abundantly RECEIVE!

A Fresh Start

I have almost made it to Monday! Last Thursday night I wondered if it would be possible. A home filled someone coughing or sneezing at every turn, by Friday morning I had simply reached my limit! Kennedy over slept, which meant needing a ride to school. Madison was whining about breakfast, Milo was deep in lala land, and I was feeling completely overwhelmed. I was 1/2 way down the drive way, when I put the van in park and said to Kennedy, 'I just need you to stay home today. I just can't do this by myself.'

By 12:00 PM every bed sheet had been changed and the house cleaned from top to bottom. The goal was to disinfected everything, so when we arrived home late Saturday night with ailing symptoms nearly gone, we would be ready to tackle the next week with a fresh start.

Little did I know, exactly how great of a FRESH start that would be.

I will admit I was not looking forward to this weekend. Family dynamics, old sibling 'roles', and being reunited with 'family' not seen in 15+ years stirs up feelings and emotions one often wants to keep laid to rest. My final words before walking out the door Friday at noon were 'Let's get going, so we can get this over with!' Little did I know, all that I had been praying for in past months God was ready answer and work some incredible transformations in a short 48 hour period of time.

My grandmother came from a generation known as 'traditionalist'. A generation having survived the Great Depression. Her generation was rich in Swedish heritage. A group of people known for not easily expressing their feelings. A generation for some, that was quick to make sure all looked good on the outside, out of fear of what some would think if the inside was revealed. God stated in the Old Testament that the sins of our fore fathers would be carried down from generation to generation and my family is no different.

I recently have been doing a lot of reflecting on Lazarus's life as told in the book of John. When Jesus called Lazarus out of the grave he had been dead for 4 days. Wrapped in his grave clothes, his stench was offensive as he cautiously and carefully shuffled back into the land of the living. Jesus did not help Lazarus remove his grave clothes, instead he asked Mary and Martha, a task not very appealing.

I stated in an early post entitled 'Reader Discretion Advised' that we all carry a stench deep within our souls. It is the stench of our grave clothes, not wanting to be unwrapped that holds us back from experiencing a full life. Hurt feelings build up an infection in our heart. We wonder how to get rid of those past hurts and feelings that hold us back. Everyone wears grave clothes, some more than others, and no one can unwrap their own. When we begin to identify and share that stench with others, an understanding and improved communication happens, resulting in a growth of love and trust. That is when we can carefully and gently help each other remove the grave clothes that prevent us from living a life to it's fullest capactiy.

As a result of the ability to be vulnerable, exposing the nakedness of my soul a conversation was had into the wee hours of the morning on Saturday. A conversation that modeled a life-giving balance of both grace and truth. Stephen Smith in the Lazarus Life states, 'Too much grace might allow grave clothes to remain on too long. Too much truth can create even deeper wounds.' The conversation was one that bridged gaps and mis-understandings. A conversation of truth and love allowing the souls of myself and others to find compassion and a deeper connection.

I came home from our short visit to NW Iowa lighter and happier. I had left some grave clothes behind and had allowed others to help me remove them. A trip that I expected to take out of respect for my grandmother, resulted in a trip full of transformation, forgiveness, truth and love.

While the distant relationship I had with her will never be restored, the relationships left here on this earth took a giant leap forward. Although those relationships will continue to need mending, nurturing, and love, a new foundation as been laid on which they can grow.

I believe THIS was the best tribute I could have left to honor her.

Sin is the steadfast refusal to be your true self. As I mentioned earlier, the sins of our fore fathers would be passed down from generation to generation. Today I can confidently share that the cycle has been broken and it will only continue to improve with a continued balance of grace and truth. When we help each other get rid of the grave clothes that hold us back, there will be no end to the work we can do for God's kingdom in order to live a life of love and truth to it's richest capacity.

Here is to a FRESH start!

Reader Discretion Is Advised.

To think of something that is disgusting the first thing that comes to mind is a porta potty. Would you agree? Do you DREAD visiting one? Have you ever heard the story of a person getting locked in and then it being tipped over? It is not only the smell that can knock one out, but for me it is what lies at the bottom. When I lift up the lid and look down, YUCK! Human waste!

Come on, we all have it! You and the people you live with 'pitch a loaf', 'drop a cannon', and 'take a duke'. Sometimes it smells so bad that even air fresheners can't mask the odor that exudes from under the door. When using a pubic restroom you flush the toilet so the person next to you, can't hear you 'let it rip'. When visiting someones home, you hope that no one will be waiting to use the bathroom after you just dumped a load!

I insist that when we stay in a hotel, that morning function be performed in the bathroom located in the lobby. I consider it a fire hazard. In a small hotel room, I could light a match and set the place on fire!

May be by now you are thinking I have completely lost it. This is disgusting and how inappropriate! Hopefully, I have made you uncomfortable as you visioned what lies in the depths of a porta potty and you remembered the odor that exudes from the bathroom. I hate to say it, but it is only going to get worse. You may want to consider the option of clicking the X in the upper right hand corner of your screen because this is going to STINK!

If you struggle seeing authenticity. If it is scary for you to witness vulnerability. If you can't handle the truth, then reader discretion is ADVISED! Please DO NOT read any further.

'By this time there was a bad odor for he had been there four days.' John 11:39

Yep, by the time Jesus showed up Lazarus had been dead for 4 days. When Jesus called out and asked the stone to be moved, Martha objected because the odor would be an unbearable. When Lazarus appeared on-lookers turned away, others shielded themselves from the odor, and I am guessing that even some ran away. But NOT Jesus, He hangs out in places that stink!

We try to cover up our stench. We speak in vague generalities about our addictions and hang-ups. We think, I don't do drugs, have a drinking problem, or gamble. Society has classified those addictions as ones that need help! When in reality they are NO different than the addictions we suffer from daily. We like to stay contained in our porta potties, hoping that no one will ask to use it.

Have you ever been waiting in line to use one? As each person comes out, what do you hear? Do the doors ease shut? Instead you here Bang, Bang, Bang, Bang, Bang.....and the people exiting immediately leave the scene. They don't want to be accused of what they 'just left'. They don't want to 'claim' what is rightfully theirs.

I have been accused of thinking that MY POOP doesn't STINK! When in fact it stinks a lot!

I want a closer more authentic relationship with Jesus AND with those around me. I have a deep longing need to be transformed, to break old habits, and create healthy ones. But before I can do this, I have to get rid of the things that smell. When I ignore the stench, I only suppress it so it can come back again leaving me to grow sicker and sicker! Transformation is a process that will only be complete when I am living in my eternal home. For now, in order to grow I have to be willingly to admit my short comings and share my stench from the past and the present. I also need to knock on some doors and ask to come in, no matter HOW bad the smell.

So I need to air my stench! I want to continue transformation and give permission to others to do the same. The Bible says that we are given trials to learn from, so that we can be a witness to others struggling with the same addictions. When I open the door to my porta potty, I know that some will run, others will listen with their nose covered, and some may even take a step forward. I also know that Jesus already knows my stench. He is waiting for me to open my door and say come in. He is wanting me to share, openly and honestly with others. He will not flee. He will not cover His nose. He will lift His head high and take in my stench. WHY? Because Jesus LOVES smelly people!

When I open the door of my porta potty and it would smell like this.

Hi. I am Jill Japenga and I really stink. I am a wife, mother, friend, daughter, sister, and business woman who has over come trials with the help of my Savior, yet I still struggle daily with hang ups and addictions. Past stenches in my life include battling depression to the brink of suicidal thoughts. Being emotionally attracted to man other than my husband. I yell and scream at my children and spouse spouting out hurtful words. I have mismanaged my finances and incurred debt over $50,000 not once, but three times. I buy things to get a quick fix. I abuse food in excess and in scarcity to fill deep voids. I over eat in secret. I try to control things. I cover up my short falls, by 'looking good' on the outside. I have lied to cover up my addictions. I am greedy, selfish, and passive aggressive. I question my capabilities as a parent. I have a hard time feeling loved.

It stinks, doesn't it?

However ONE THING I know for SURE is that no matter who runs or who stays, Jesus is here, every day and in every way. I know that I am an ordinary woman with everyday hang ups and addictions. I know that every day I desire to grow and walk in my faith for I know that it is the ONLY way to overcome my addictions. I know that I am learning to receive and to give love, to forgive and to extend grace. I know that EVERY day my addictions have been forgive and my slate made clean, yet I am still excepted to rely on Him to become healthier each day. I know am learning to invite others into my porta potty and to knock on the doors of those around me. I know I will be rejected and let down. I also know that some will let me in and those invitations will make the rejections seem minuscule.

Chris Tomlin said it best, 'There are ONLY two things to do in this life. The first is to love the Lord your God with all your heart, your soul, and your mind. The second is to love your neighbor as your self. When you focus on those TWO things there is no end to how you will transform yourself and be a light that shines for others to see.'

Welcome to my Porta Potty.

shhhhh...Can you hear that?

As we continue the Lazarus series at church, we just wrapped up Chapter 4 on hearing the Voice Of Love. I loved this chapter and so far, probably my favorite.

If you haven't read the Lazarus Life, by Stephen Smith I would highly recommend it! It is an easy read with a powerful message.

The question was posed yesterday. How does God speak to us? The message was simple, straight, and to the point.

1. God speaks through chance encounters. I believe that there are no such things as coincidences, but instead God-incidences. Times when things appear to happen by chance or luck, when really it is all in the master plan. If you are not paying attention you may miss them. Often times we look back in retrospec to realize the grasp of what happened. In our family, we call those moments 'mini miracles'. For a GREAT mini miracle story, check out a post in January of 08, called 'It's a Mini Miracle'. It is a great story about seeing how God works in the VERY small things of life.

2. God speaks to us through scripture. The times that I doubt and wonder what to do, are times that through His Word I am affirmed and given direction. Sometimes a verse will pop in my head or while reading scripture, it will 'jump' off the page. In those moments I KNOW that God is talking directly to me. In order to have God speak to you through scripture, you have to get in the Word. The most effective learning tool for me was to join a scripture based bible study. Not one that followed a book, but one that ONLY used the bible as the study. Books are good, but the absolute TRUTH is the BEST! Bible Study Fellowship was the vehicle that I used for 7 years, until I 'graduated'. I very intentionally and indepthly studied the entire Bible. It is an international organization with studies all around the world. If you click on the web site below, I bet you will find one in your neck of the woods! They also have an amazing children's program. I believe a lot of Madison's faith base came from being involved with BSF! Check it out! www.bsfinternational.org

3. Conversations with other people. Are you paying attention to the conversations you are having every day? There have been times when a friend or even a stranger says something to me that 'just sticks'. Just a few weeks ago when interviewing for an administration position, I was able to spend an incredible hour with a man of faith. Obviously, I am in a very prayerful time of my life as I seek direction on job opportunities and the growth of my Reveal business. I believe that I was meant to have an encounter with him that day. Although we never directly discussed my situation, it was one sentence that he said that reaffirmed the steadfast direction I am pursuing. He said, 'I believe that you are a very gifted person, who knows exactly what your gifts and talents are. I believe that you should embrace those gifts and continue to follow the path in which they are leading you down.' It was in that exact moment that I believe God used him to give me the affirmation I was seeking on the continue pursuit of Reveal. I was called back for a second interview, but I didn't get the job.

4. God speaks to us through circumstances. I believe EVERYTHING happens in life for a reason or a lesson to be learned. Because of our free will, we sometimes don't make the right decisions and those choices lead to results that are negative. We live in a imperfect world, negative things happen like floods, earthquakes, and diseases. Because Adam and Eve ate the apple, things are just messed up. Sometime we suffer as a result of things we have no control over. Other times we suffer as a direct result of a poor choice. No one is immune to suffering, it is part of the journey. But whatever the circumstance, there is always HOPE! Sometimes those lessons are good and sometimes those lessons are painful. But the ABSOLUTE end result will be INCREDIBLE! We just have to continue to walk this journey, enduring the detours and bumps, and gaining insight with the lessons learned along the way. God can lead us through ANYTHING! Had the failing economy not affected us through a recent job loss, I don't believe we would have grown in the incredible ways that we have over the last 2 months. Painful... absolutely! Enriching.... beyond words!

This is a prayer that I wrote that was used at our services yesterday. I hope that it blesses you.

I believe that I am a unique and extraordinary person, created by You my Heavenly Father.

I am created for a life filled with change as You mold, shape, and walk with me through this transformation.

Father forgive me for I know that I have filled my life with busyness, alienating myself from fully experiencing your love.

I have allowed self-rejection to fill my head and heart with the lies. I have sought and gained knowledge of You, yet I remain the same.

Help me to experience that nothing is more important than learning to love others and receive love in return.

Today, I ask that You take my knowledge of Your love and sink it deep into the depth of my heart. I no longer want to be sidelined from true transformation.

Silence my surroundings and thoughts, so I can only hear Your Voice.

Swell my heart with Your love as I accept the invitation to be my authentic self for You and for others.

For You are the one true Voice, who gives me unconditional love, a love that has no end.

Amen

Then he was told, "Go, stand on the mountain at attention before God. God will pass by."

A hurricane wind ripped through the mountains and shattered the rocks before God, but God wasn't to be found in the wind; after the wind an earthquake, but God wasn't in the earthquake; and after the earthquake fire, but God wasn't in the fire; and after the fire a gentle and quiet whisper. 1 Kings 19:11 - 12

When God spoke to Elijah, He wasn't in the hurricane, the wind, the earthquake or even the fire. He was in the gentle and quiet whisper.

Sometimes in order to see and hear God communicate with us, we must pray, watch, listen, observe, and truly be aware of His daily presence in our lives. How are you witnessing His workings and communication to you, TODAY? Many times it is in the subtle, quiet things of life.

Shhhh....can you hear that?

Blessings.

Jill

25 Things You May Not Know About Me.

1. I graduated from college to be a nurse and was an RN for 6 years.

2. I am a very poor test taker. I failed my nursing board exam the first time and tried (got caught) cheating on a drivers test once (of which I failed too.)

3. My favorite color vacillates between green and orange. Depends on the day.

4. I LOVE donuts! Could live on them all day, every day!

5. I never drank alcohol in high school. In fact, most Saturday nights were spent watching rented movies with my parents, eating popcorn and jelly beans. A socialite, I was not!

6. I was homecoming queen in high school. That definitely DOESN'T match up to #5.

7. I am not by nature a touchy/feely person, but deep down inside I want to be.

8. I have had 4 surgeries, all on the LEFT side of my body. Foot, Knee, Back, and Arm. My rib cage is larger on my left side than my right. Guess that would make me off kilter!

9. I won 9 high school state championship titles between 1983 and 1987 in track and field and was an All-American in 1992.

10. I have OCD tendencies when it comes to having everything having a place and everything IN it's place.

11. I love, love, love, love.....LOVE...organizing! That is why everything has a place!

12. I absolutely HATE it when people don't RSVP!

13. I could NEVER be a teacher or a childcare provider. I don't have enough patience.

14. I believe everything happens for a reason or a lesson to be learned.

15. My favorite time of the day is going to bed! My least favorite time of the day is getting out of bed! I LOVE my cozy, comfy bed!

16. I wish I could be a professional dancer, like the ones on Dancing With The Stars.

17. I could dance ALL NIGHT at parties. Pretending I am a GREAT dancer. Well, I am NOT half bad! I also wish I could be a really good singer! Again, not 1/2 bad.

18. The longest I can go without hair & make-up products is 7 days. I have tried it!

19. I love buying clothes, sometimes too much! I am an event buyer. If I have an event, date, or trip coming up I love getting a new outfit.

20. A special treat for me is having the house COMPLETELY to myself for a weekend.

21. I love adventures! Going unknown places, experiencing NEW things, creating new ideas, planning trips.

22. I thrive on challenges, especially when there is a reward to achieve.

23. I don't have a lot of friends, but rather a few very close friends.

24. I enjoy cooking things from scratch (bread, cookies and pies).

25. If I had to pick one character trait I admire most in people, it would be integrity.

There you have it. Did you find out something you didn't know? How many did you know?

You were there by Avalon

Enjoy and please read the blog entry below to hear a story behind this song.

The Battery That NEVER Dies!

With our recent restructuring of finances one of the things to go was my oh, so favorite kickboxing classes! Milo lost his ability to workout at Aegon and both of us ranked our physical health towards the top of our priority list. It is hard to walk outside in winter weather and Milo is limited on the amount of walking/running he can do with his back history. It made no sense to double dip for fitness dues, so I discontinued my membership in order to get a membership at a small 24 hour fitness center.

That was a tough one for me, because when it comes to working out I like to show up, have someone tell me what to do, do it, and then leave. Now I walk in and look at a few treadmills, a bike, and an elliptical and I can't say I jump for joy!

In preparing for this 'dreaded' workout experience I fetched my ipod, which you guessed it was DEAD. I rolled my eyes knowing that those girls had been using it and 'forgot' to plug it in. With hope, I connected it to it's power source and on the screen flashed 'VERY Low Battery' with this bright red warning. I had NEVER seen this before! I immediately thought, 'What did those girls do!' All I wanted to do was simply put on my music and get this workout done. Now I was faced with working out to the joy of my heavy breathing! So with 5 minutes to spare I let it catch a 'little' charge and off I went with my new found 'workout' buddy (AKA grocery shopping companion, kid runner, handy man, dishwasher unloader).

I knew that I had 90 minutes to fill, because that was how long Milo's workout would take. My strategy was 30 bike/30 elliptical/30 treadmill. As I located my new found friend, I climbed on and was hoping to get at least 5 minutes of ipod time. Sure enough, just turning it on the battery indicator went from green to red. I immediately went to one of my new favorite songs, 'You Were There'. The song was 6 minutes and 58 seconds.

I started pedaling and prayed, 'please let my battery last long enough to here this song. I really need it right now. I just need to hear how David was given the strength to slain the giant and how Abraham's obedience was blessed during his darkest hour, and through all that you are and will always be there. Please just get me through this one song.'

I continued pedaling.

The song wrapped up and my ipod still had not shut off. I moved up a song on my play list. My red indicator light grew smaller and smaller and soon was a faint line that I could barely see.

I continued to pedal.

The songs were filled with love, hope, and renewal. 45 minutes later as sweat beads are dropping, the next song was another favorite, Chris Tomlin's 'Jesus Messiah', I realized what was happening and mixed with sweat beads, huge crocodile tears started falling, and I was humbled beyond imaginable.

80 minutes later and with no indicator light now, 'How Can I Keep From Singing Your Name' finished and my ipod shut off. I looked to my left and Milo said, 'I only have 5 minutes left, my ipod is about to die.'

I smiled and said, 'pray about it.'

I left that 24 hour fitness place with a renewed sense of hope, peace, and comfort for our lives. It was one of my BEST workouts to date.

That's right. Because I, your God, have a firm grip on you and I'm not letting go. I'm telling you, 'Don't panic. I'm right here to help you.' Isaiah 40:13

Living Simple

New developments in the Japenga house regarding employment status once again. I can't believe as little as 6 months ago we were faced with the same type of situation, however it was buffered with 'we will help find you something else within Aegon'.

Milo got a call this morning at 9:00 with the news that he was being let go due to restructuring. This time with no 'we will help you find another position within Aegon, but instead, here is your severance package.'

We had some wind of rumblings yesterday when Milo's boss was flying into Cedar Rapids from Florida for an 'airport' meeting. Interesting because Milo was scheduled to be in Florida on Thursday. The flight was canceled due to weather, then in the afternoon we got wind that 2 wholesalers were being let go.

This is a great time for me to share some awesome God stories.

I know for SURE three times when God speaks to me.

1. In the shower
2. Alone in the car
3. Waking me up in the middle of the night

So in the past week, I got a wake up call twice. The first with the exact words and visual aid to use in a tough conversation that is scheduled for today. That is a whole other story. Second with the words that Milo was losing his job.

Then Madison walks in my office yesterday morning. 'Mom, want to hear my verse for the Christmas program? So, then do not be afraid. I'll provide for you and your children.' Genesis 50:21

I was also drawn to read the book 'Multiple Blessings' by Jon and Kate plus 8 these past two days. Finished it, wondering if by reading their remarkable testimony of how God provides, if He wasn't preparing me for the road ahead. I would highly recommend it!

Working as nurse, I can say that NEVER in my career did one of my patients get to the point of needing resuscitation on the unit, I always had a 'gut feeling' even before there were any indicators that something was heading south. When I acted on that gut instinct, I some how managed to get them transferred to critical care and sure enough often times within minutes of getting there, they would crash.

I so believe and 'most' of the time listen to that small, inner voice and most definitely feel that we are getting ready for a rollercoaster ride in our family. A ride filled with trials and valleys, a ride to test just how dependent we can be even down to the smallest things like paper towels.

Part of me is scared to death as I sit with a deep pit in my stomach typing and the other part can't wait to jump on the rollercoaster.

So we have officially jumped on the ride. We will be sharing with the girls tonight after church. Sitting and taking a good hard look at places to cut in the budget. Milo had recently updated his resume and has a phone call into a recruiting agency. With the start of my new business, we tousle with me continuing to pursue that, as it has great income potential but also a lot of 'unknowns' or do I look for a 'job'. That is a big struggle for me, as I so firmly believed that God was leading me down that path. I will continue to pray for guidance and direction.

I optimistically shared this morning, 'You know Milo we have lived simple before, we know how to do it.' So here is to ham sandwiches, pancakes, mac and cheese, and simply relying completely on God's provision.

Stay tuned for a lot more God stories!

Hugs.

Jill

A Prayer Answered!

I can't even begin to explain what an incredible day it has been. God's presence was so felt! There were tears and laughter, awesome shopping, and major transformation! For a woman turning 40, she is on her way to a new phase of her life. The last two years have been met with the loss of a younger sister to pancreatic cancer, the loss of her grandmother, and in January the loss of her marriage. When she woke up today she wondered how she would get through this 'milestone' day in her life. By the end of the day, she was flying higher than a kite! Just dropped her off at her SURPRISE birthday party and a room full of 35 friends and family to Reveal her NEW LOOK!

From this picture, you can see that BETTER DAYS ARE AHEAD!

On the way to the salon I shared with her how I had been praying for her and asking God what I could possibly do or say to help ease her pain. I shared that I believe God answered my prayer when her next door neighbor called and wanted to give her a Reveal Day and Party for her 40th birthday. I told her that God answered that prayer by giving me to opportunity to spend an entire day with her making her feel beautiful and giving her hope for better days ahead. We cried the whole way.

All I could do after I got in the van after dropping her off at her Reveal party was weep tears of joy for having a prayer answered. With God's words and prescence I believe that at the END of this day she is a renewed woman, knowing that she is unbelievably beautiful on the inside and out, that there is always hope for a brighter days ahead!

GOD IS GOOD!

It's a Mini Miracle!

In our house we have the saying, "It is a mini miracle!" It is our way of thanking God for helping us with the 'little things' of life.

During the Christmas break we are blessed with a few extra days to catch up on those projects around the house that just never get done. I was busy undecorating the tree and Milo was changing out the dead blot on our front door. A mishap that occurred this fall after he locked himself out of the house. He was in route to a Packers game, when he realized that his tickets for the game were still in the house and three hours later was with the locksmith drilling a hole in our lock.

Milo is always eager to jump into a 'do-it-yourself' project leaving the directions to fall to the bottom of the pile of nuts, blots, and screws. During this particular project, I could sense from across the room that the tension was rising and frustration was increasing. Once the lock was in place, one could easily unlock it from the inside, but when trying to unlock it from the outside, the dead blot would not move. With each new attempt at installation, shouts of frustration rang through the house. "This piece of crap." "What could I possibly be doing wrong." "I am sick of this." Then finally, "This is the last attempt that I am making!"

That attempt being #5.

As I chuckled to myself, not wanting to add any additional fuel to the fire or offer any suggestions. I silently prayed. "Lord, please give him the wisdom to identify what piece he is missing. Help him to successfully install the lock."

After the 'last' attempt was made, he shouted, "Jill, come over hear and see how this piece of crap is not going to work, AGAIN!" He turned the dead bolt from the inside and as usual it worked.

He then marched with great determination to the outside lock, key in hand, and eager to prove his theory once again. He inserted the key, turned it once, and the lock worked. He then turned it again and it worked! He turned it one more time and it worked AGAIN!

Amazed at his accomplishment, he opened the door and I smiled and said, "It is a mini-miracle!" I shared that I had prayed before his 'final' attempt and had asked God to show him the piece he was missing.

I asked, "Did you do something different this time?"

He replied, "Yea, I added this little plastic piece and I turned it right side up."

I just turned and said, "God is good!"

I smiled and hoped that God was chuckling with me, at the thought of it being upside down and where were the directions?

Even in the tinest, things of our life, God is at work! He can take a simple 'do-it-yourself' home project and turn it into an opportunity to THANK Him for our blessings.

When was the last time YOU witnessed a mini miracle?

Jill

What! I can't bring my make-up!

After a summer vacation to the Black Hills, my husband got the 'biker bug'. Although he had been talking for some time about getting a motorcycle, the bug bit him bad while visiting the famous Sturgis Rally! The thought of the freedom of the road and leaving your cares behind had him convinced that he wanted to be a biker dude. I will have to admit that I wasn't all that excited about the thought of becoming a 'biker babe', however in support of the cause I went along for the ride.

This fall we scheduled a weekend without the kids for us to spend some time together and of course it had to entail the NEW bike! Being a new biker, he was still learning the ropes of riding and so to branch out, we decided to go on a mini road trip. Now by mini, I mean 30 miles outside of Cedar Rapids to the booming metropolis of Anamosa. We had heard of a great new restaurant in town and thought a day on the bike enjoying the fall weather and then a nice dinner would be a great weekend treat. Believe it or not the only hotel in Anamosa was full, so we had to make our hotel reservation in the next town which was an additional 30 miles away.

Being a bit of a high maintenance girl, as I was putting things together, I am thinking that after a day on the bike I planned to shower, do my hair and make-up, put on a nice outfit, and go out for dinner. However in order to do that, I would need to get back on the bike and ride 30 miles back to my dinner destination, thus completely defeating the purpose of doing my hair and make-up. So on that pretense, I made the decision that I was just not quite ready to be an official biker chick and that while he drove the bike to Anamosa, I would follow in the car with my suitcase in tow!

During my quiet time today, as I continue to study Matthew and Mark, I had to chuckle as I read about how after Jesus called His disciples, He then sent them out with specific instructions. Those instructions were "Take nothing for the journey except a staff, no bread, no bag, no money in your belts. Wear sandals but not an extra tunic. Whenever you enter a house, stay there until you leave that town. And if any place will not welcome you or listen to you, shake the dust off your feet when you leave as a testimony against them." Mark 6: 8 - 11

WOW! No food, no suitcase, no money, no clothes, and ONLY ONE pair of shoes! I thought and I can't go 30 miles without my suitcase chucked full of all my stuff!

Jesus was beginning His ministry and now He had equipped His disciples to go out and heal the sick, share His message, and drive out demons. While His following was growing, there were still others who were against His teachings.

I put myself in the disciples position. What must have they been thinking? "You want me to go out and do what you have been doing, rely on others to provide shelter, food, and wash my clothes, and when someone rejects me, simply 'shake off the dust on my feet' and go onto the next one. Come on, can't I pack just a little carry-on bag, just in case?"

Jesus instructed that no carry-on was allowed and then went so far as to share what would also happen to them on their journey. And by the way, you will be persecuted,arrested, flogged, and men will hate you because of me.

But you know what the disciples did? THEY WENT ANY WAY.

How often do we step out in faith? In November, I shared a blog that faith was just a few steps at a time. I think that was the mentality that the disciples took, when they set out on there journey. "OK, lets just go to the first town."

Jesus promises us that "Whoever acknowledges me before men. I will also acknowledge him before my Father in heaven. But whoever disowns me before men, I will disown him before my Father in heaven." Matthew 10:32-33

Our stay on earth is so temporary, but our stay in eternity is FOREVER! Where will you spend your eternity, because of your choices and decisions here on earth?

Are you willingly to step out in faith and share what God has done for you in your life? Not knowing how it will be received, are you willingly to take a chance? Are you willing to give up a comfort in your life in order to carve out some time each day to spend working on your relationship with Him? What are you willingly to give up?

So while I am still working on being a biker chick, what I have learned from this lesson is that it is OK to mess up my hair. May be the freedom of the road is not such a bad thing. May be just taking off with only the clothes on my back and just seeing what happens, is an exciting adventure I want to be a part of! May be it is easier to leave all my stuff at home!

Jill

Puking Out The Car Window

Ever have one of 'those' days?

As we are rushing out the door this morning, my youngest, who stayed up a bit to late last night was complaining of a tummy ache. In the rush of the morning, I summed it up in one sentence. "I am sure you are just a tired."

Sure enough, about 40 minutes later the phone rings and it is the school nurse sounding just as trepidations as I was about the 'tummy ache'. We again reinforced the need to 'hang in there' and back to class she went. About an hour later I get another call saying she has thrown up on the playground, however it was not witnessed and according to Madison, "Well, it was a little, not really that much." It was the 'official' puking that does call for the mother to officially come and pick up her child from school and even the nurse chuckled as she hung up the phone.

During this conversation, I am getting beeped by my oldest that she had forgotten her saxophone and needed me to bring to school. I reschedule the rest of my day, leave to pick up my 'sick' child and drop off the saxophone. When I arrive at the nurse's office, I am greeted with a smirk and Madison climbs into the back seat sighing as she props her head on the door. I am thinking, 'she thinks she has pulled a fast one." Off to the next school to drop off the saxophone and like any good mother, I am formulating in my head how I can truly verify this 'illness'.

Knowing that she loves hot chocolate at her favorite coffee shop, I ask if it is OK, to stop and pick up a cup of coffee in the drive through lane. She agrees but to my surprise, she doesn't request a thing. She sighs again and props her coat up as a pillow and I think, "She is on to my investigation."

Then without a moment to spare, as I am pulling out of the drive through lane, hot coffee in hand, she flies up from seat, screams for me to roll down the window, and proceeds to leave a trail the rest of the way home. I on the other hand, go down for yet another 'worst mother of the year award'. As the wind is blowing her hair in her face as she is now into the drive heaves stage still hanging out the window, she cries out, 'Dear Jesus, I don't think I can make it. Please help me. Mom, just keep driving."

The innocence of a child and what lessons we can learn. I am so grateful that she has a heart for the Lord that despite any short comings that her mom may have, she relies on the Lord for her strength and for me to help her in her journey. 'Mom, just keep driving.' Lessons learned to slow down and pay attention to the details in life. Lessons not to think 'I know everything' and lessons to remember that Jesus is always there for us, even when we are puking out the car window.

A wonderful friend of mine emailed me today and shared that for no reason at all, God had placed me on her heart a month ago and she had been praying for me. Unknown to her, I have been really struggling this past month and in a pity party I was throwing on Sunday, shouted to my husband, 'No one really cares about me.' I have been shouting for months, "God, are you there? Help me out here!" God through all His wisdom led her to email me today of all days to share that she had been praying of me and didn't really know why. I was able to share some of my struggles and thanked her for guidance and prayers.

As Madison and I pulled into the garage, she gingerly gets out of the car and says, "Sorry for puking all over your car, mom." I smile and say, "You can puke all over my car any time. Sorry for having to stop for coffee." We venture into the house for a bath and an afternoon of cartoons, a blanket and a pillow, and snuggles on the couch.

Isn't our God just like that. We cry out, "Please Jesus, help me. I don't think I can make it." He is there to rub our backs, send us friends to support us as we look up to Him and say, "sorry for puking all over you." He smiles back and says, "I forgive you and I love you."

To experience the mountain top experiences of life, we often times have to walk through the valleys and back up the rugged terrain of the mountain. We even find ourselves puking out the car window and crying out for help, all the while remembering that we have the most everlasting, amazing God, who loves us and wants a personal relationship with us. He is our Savior and will always take the car to the car wash!

Sincerely and With Love,
Jill